Comcast Commercials SUCK!

So today I thought that I would write about something that has irked me for the past couple of days. I don't know how many of you subscribe to Comcast cable, or even pay attention to such things, but their new commercials are just horrible. Luckily, where I am at we don't have cable (we pirate all of our cable shows off of such wonderful web sites like ninjavideo)but if we did, Comcast would be the only cable provider for us to choose from. Anyway, I digress. Back to the commercials. These new Comcast commercials are just horrible. Who ever came up with their new ad campaign needs to be sacked. To give you an idea of how bad these commericials are I will try to describe their suck. So here goes nothing.

First off, the Comcast's ad campaign is titled "Dream Big." Dream big about what? Sitting on the couch stuffing my face with chips and soda? I guess it sounds good to have a million HD channels and have your internet, phone, and cable bills all tied together. But is this really what we are supposed to be dreaming about, more TV channels? If the content of television warranted "Dreaming Big," I would better understand this ad campaign. But since most of the shows on television entail some sort of "reality," this or that I can hardly see anything inspiring me, or any other viewer for that matter, to "Dream Big." If anyone seriously wants to compete to be some brainless man or woman's bride or groom, "The Bachelor," a false sense of fame, "American Idol," or something else that isn't really tangible. I guess what I am trying to say here is that based on the content on Television unless you want to dream to be the biggest peeping tom, or the most notorious voyeur in the world keep watching TV, there is plenty of crap on it to inspire you. For the rest of us, I don't think this message really works.

Secondly the music and the sound of the actors' voices is just grating on the nerves. If you have seen the movie "Juno," or listened to any music considered "indie," or part of the "hipster," social subgroup you will know what I am talking about. Basically stereotypical "indie," music sounds uninspired, the musicians sound bored and tired most of the time. Now, this is not to say that "indie," (and I use this term very loosely, for lack of a better term,) is all bad. I happen to like quite a few groups that would be considered "indie," bands. Any how the actors sound exactly like a stereotypical "indie" band: like they are on lortab. Now I'm not one to have high standards for sales gimmicks, but if you're trying to sell me something, at least sound like you are excited to sell it to me. When you sound bored, tired, and uninterested in the product or service you are selling to me, I become bored, tired and uninterested in the product you are selling to me. It's as simple as that. This is just a poor attempt at trying to sound "hip," and "cool" to gen Xers, Yers, and hipsters. Enough said, anyone with a brain can see through that part of the ad campaign.

The actual content of these ads also leaves something to be desired. Everyone acts like they are going about their daily business in some sort of cartoon world. WTF?!?!?! I don't know about you but I don't live in a cartoon world unless I take acid ( I do not condone the use of drugs, I have never done acid, I swear). In one ad, there is a dude sitting in his hot tub watching TV, who does that? With all the money I would spend on a flat screen television, I sure as hell would not put it above my hot tub. Real people don't do that kind of thing unless they have Giraffe money (i.e. people who have: A. enough money to buy a giraffe and B. know where, how, and who to get a Giraffe from). I don't have Giraffe money, and most of the people I know don't have Giraffe money either. In my favorite of the bad Comcast ads a guy is "singing" about how his girlfriend is kept happy because Comcast's plan includes a DVR or TiVo or some sort of recording device, I don't know. But the point is this guy does not have a girlfriend as hot as the one in the ad. This guy seriously looks like a poor man's Seth Rogen. No girl as hot as this guys commercial girlfriend would go for a guy like that, unless he had Giraffe money. Frankly, a more realistic commercial would depict this guy as a frat guy drinking beer with his buds watching scrambled porn in a roach motel of an apartment, eating stale pizza they ordered God knows how long ago, while rocking out to Jack Johnson or Nickelback, high fiving everytime they think they see a fuzzy boob, or shotgun a beer. I like the sound of that commercial way better, more realistic I think.

These Comcast commercials have been grating on me for a couple days now so I thought I would make a feeble attempt at trying to describe my hatred for them. Here is my favorite one for you guys to look at so you can get a better idea of what I am talking about.

If you have anymore thoughts concerning Comcast's commercials or other pet peeves feel free to leave a comment.

Well I think that about does it for right now, tune in next time.